Doin' the Cha Cha

As my last few posts have already stated, 2015 into the beginning of 2016 was a very difficult time for me, and I didn't really have the energy to keep up with either blog.  Most days I'm ok, some days I'm not ok.  A lot of times they cross over.  I mentioned in passing in another post that I got married in December of 2015.  I can't express how thankful I am for that man.  He is my best friend, my rock, my biggest help and supporter no matter what I'm going through.  If he can handle the hot mess of an emotional roller coaster I was last year he's going to be able to handle anything! ;)  At the end of July we moved into a trailer out in the country and it has been so good for us!  It's so peaceful and quiet, we can relax and be ourselves, it gives us time to just enjoy each other's company, we love it so much!  He's been doing so well in his job, he just passed his CDL test so he'll be getting a raise, I found a job closer to where we live so that's always nice, I'm only traveling 30 minutes instead of an hour.  I've had 4 nieces and nephews born since we've gotten married, babies everywhere and I'm in love haha :)  (my wallet may not be though lol).  Most days I'm really able to see all the blessings I have in life.  I'm closer to my mom and great-grandmother and church now, I have so many close friends that are supportive of me, we're finally able to set money aside for the FUTURE, it almost feels like we're grown ups.  And then some days, like today when it's dreary and drizzly, and pictures and memories come across my newsfeed on facebook, I get sad all over again.  Back in March on instagram I wrote "I think that sometimes moving on/recovering from great loss is less about feeling better than it is about knowing it's ok to not feel better.  Sometimes it's about allowing yourself to take a step back and grieve some more before taking those next few steps forward."  Life's a dance, happy sad, give and take.  It's comforting to know that even when I sit back and cry and miss people dearly that it's natural and part of life.